In my previous blog, the issue of alienation was discussed, which is the main issue developed in the story, "Me and the Blondes." I talked about Sophia Kandinsky, a fifteen year old whose secrets compel her to move around different schools, in search of a place where she could belong. To show what alienation could lead to, I will discuss the effects of alienation in this post using a song.
Nobody's Home by Avril Lavigne
Nobody's Home: Avril Lavigne
I chose the song "Nobody's Home" by Avril Lavigne as it accurately represents this issue through the eyes of a bystander, Lavigne, who is acquainted with a girl, "she", with similar struggles. The title of the song defines how the character feels as she finds herself to be an outcast, feels lonely and doesn't have a companion to share her worries with. I saw Sophia's pain and emotion in the lyrics and instrumental of the song, which is why I chose this piece. The song does not only make the listener feel for the character, but is also well-connected to the story. The paragraphs below show how the song connects to "Me and the Blondes."
To start off, in the chorus of the song, Lavigne says, "She wants to go home, but nobody's home. Its where she lies, broken inside." These lyrics strongly depict Sophia's inner struggle, as home is considered a place where one can love and be loved, and Sophia feels deprived of both. At one point in the story, Sophia decides she wants to tell The Blondes- her newly found friend group, about her father, but then remembers, "Belong? Tell them about this? How could anyone begin to understand this?" (Toten 159). This shows how Sophia doesn't have a place to go to where she can be with the people she loves and can confide in, and she does not find a fix to her problems.
Next, the second verse continues the story of the girl, when Lavigne says, "You've been rejected, and now you can't find, what you left behind." This relates to Sophia as she was bullied in her old schools, which has left a scar on her, as she believes change is necessary for others to accept her. This is seen when Madison finds out the truth about her father, and Sophia shuts down completely, only thinking of the worse and says, "Six schools. I just wasn't up for number seven. They were probably laughing right now" (Toten 203). We also learn about Sophia being rejected and bullied by her friends in previous schools when she describes, "I went to five lousy schools...because it was that ugly once people found out. That's how absolutely everyone is!" (Toten 211) .In the hook of the song, the lyrics say, "Too many problems...don't know where she belongs." These words are simple, yet powerful as they embody Sophia's main struggle, and the reason why she switched around different schools.
Lastly, the bridge of the song defines how, "her feelings she hides...she can't find her place...she's losing her faith...she's fallen from grace." Since the beginning of the story, it is shown that Sophia pretends to be content to prevent others from being hurt, when in reality she is grieving herself. This is seen when Sophia gets in a fight with her mother and says, "My hands clenched, the words rose in me, I ate them" (Toten 75). Near the end of the story, Sophia convinces herself that she will never belong anywhere after Madison discovers the truth about her father, and she says "It would always be like this...there was no magic bullet, no protection, no point" (Toten 203). This shows Sophia has lost faith in all friendships. In addition, as Lavigne describes the breaking point of a person with all the emotions building inside them, with no way to let anyone else know, Sophia addresses herself in the mirror gifted to her by her father, and says "If I hit her...Sophie would shatter, put her out of her misery. The floor would be covered in glittering stars...I would take one...and anoint my writs...Papa's princess would never hurt again" (Toten 203). Insecure, and paralyzed by fear of how others would react to finding out the truth, Sophia prepares to kill herself due to this isolation. Sophia's character goes through phases of bullying and estrangement, and as Lavigne says in the ending of her song, she is "lost inside."
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